New Doorstep Crime
  Another new scam
  Reduce cold callers at your home
  NEW WEBMASTER REQUIRED
  New non-emergency telephone number for the Police
  Latest Claygate Courier On Line editions

The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "right here, officer". Later, I parked it on the freeway, got out, and yelled at all the cars, "Get out of my driveway!"
Steven Wright